I survive September with the x to the power of n weddings!
Ok, am going to rant a bit here about SOUNDMAN. Pls click on the x button on the top right corner of this window if you are/were a soundman before.
Ok, first of all, I nearly wanted to kill a soundman with my bare hands last Sun at a wedding at xxx hotel ballroom. If you claim you are the soundman, pls make sure you give me good sound. Few near fatal mistakes he made (fatal as in, he could have been killed by me post-show):
1. During the soundcheck everything went well. 1hr later when we were back, wedding started, door was about to be opened to welcome the couple into the ballroom, I was supposed to sing but was horrified to find my mic was not ON! I was waving my hands to the soundman like ‘Save me!’, but of course, the soundman was so high up in the sound room, and the whole ballroom was SO dark and all eyes on the door, nobody would have known if I had dropped dead from exasperation (except my musicians). I mean, how could you off the mics for the live band when you know the live band is performing LIVE for the march-in song?! My ex used to say – there’s no cure for stupidity and I agree. More to come:
2. Prob #1 was resolved after quickly changing to male singer’s mic. Finally the soundman looked down at me after the march-in and realised that my mic was still not on (No, I did not show him my read-between-the-line fingers –> I only hallucinate when I’m extremely fired up). Then I realised that my mic was softer than male singer’s mic. This needed to be resolved because I did not wish to expend my energy screaming into the mic to match his level, for solos, and most importantly for the balance in vol for duets, and it was just 2 songs into the whole 1.5hr performance. Apparently, the soundman was in the control room – I doubt he can hear the sound balance in the room, so I don’t know why that is the control room, but anyway. While male singer was singing, I stormed into the kitchen and asked for the manager because he was nowhere to be found in the ballroom. Asked manager to pls get the soundman to up MY vol to MATCH the male singer’s vol. Guess what, he upped the male singer’s vol so male singer now sounded even louder. i.e. he confused our mic channels –> Either you were on drugs in the room during soundcheck, or ………honestly, I can’t think of any other reason.
3. Finally he realised the mistake and upp my vol, until REALLY LOUD. Then strangely, he went to decrease male singer’s mic till it’s rather soft for no good reason. I’m like –> wordless in the mind because his behaviour was too bizarre for me to comprehend at any level.
4. I think male singer was also praying hard that I would not self-combust and jeopardise group’s reputation as I was trying very hard to get a grip on myself while communicating to the manager. But really, among the many types of people I really hate, like dishonest/fake/attention-grabbing pigs, unqualified soundmen are equally ranked up there.
Yes, I may not be the best, but I spent so much time crafting the art, what gives you the right to steal what I could deliver with mere incompetence on your side?!
Ok, ranted. Zzzz.